Friday, September 21, 2012

Kingdom Advances

Lately I have been really discouraged, overwhelmed, and a bit frustrated with studying Early Childhood Education. As I've posted before, I felt God wanted me to study child development.

"If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me" Mark 8:34

I love kids, but I don't want to be a teacher.  Frankly, I cannot even imagine working from 7:15 am till 5 Monday through Friday for on average $10 an hour 0_0  Oklahoma teachers are some of the WORST paid in the country.  Which is more than awful.  Children are obviously our future and important.   I guess some people don't realize that? But I won't dive into that fully.  Don't get my wrong, I love teachers and am extremely thankful for the good ones.  It takes a special calling!!

Anyways, I don't want to be a teacher or stuck in a classroom or make my life career from teaching.  People who study Early Childhood Education do it to become a.....teacher.   Obviously God has some other plans here I just don't exactly know what yet.

I do know that I'm called.

Called to love the nations and children around the world. give shoes to the shoeless... a missions college...

I'm called to be at Tulsa Community College at this time in life to study Children's development.

"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled" Matthew 5:6

This is my second year at TCC and I'm so close to graduating! Last year I asked God for confirmation (pertaining to studying Child Development) and in all my books except government and civil war history focused on KENYA.  Crazy cool, huh?!  My child psychology books main focus, yes the entire book, was......... Kenya. Not Africa or another country in Africa, but.....Kenya! Okay so that was awesome.

This year I've said, "Lord I do trust you.  I'm discouraged because I'm not really interested in the material I'm learning.  Could ya send me some reminders that I'm doing this because you've called me to?"

I prayed that on my way to class yesterday and during class my friend Patricia said, "hey, I want to pay the $90 conference fee (one of our assignments for another class)" She then said that in her prayer time God has dropped it in her heart to pay for my conference fee because I was studying Early Childhood Education to advance the Kingdom!

I say to the Lord... I lean on you, I trust in your way even though I may not understand it. Make my path and I shall follow it. Help me to remember this!

"If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me" Mark 8:34

"Who is this coming up from the desert leaning on her lover?" Songs 8:5  

Thursday, September 13, 2012

With a Heavy Heart...

With a heavy heart I write these words...

mere mumblings of my heart laid out paper.

Its been so long since I've spoken to you, heard your voice, or heard your thoughts.

My heart is heavy, but healing is vast, deep, a long drawn out beautiful process.

It's been over a year. Looming heartache is dissipating.  

God promises healing, but because of my faults I feel the stings of a life I never lived, nor will ever live.

I feel God's spirit moving in my life, creating new and beautiful things.  

"The sun will rise, wont you dry all your tears and lay your burdens down?"

My prayer? My prayer is that God will continue to bring forth beautiful things in these hearts.  Separate, lovely, beautiful, different, God-inspired, God-driven, God- breathed desires that come from Him alone.

What a beautiful picture of God's grace and healing in hearts of those that need it the most.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

The Sun Will Rise

                                                             ...There is Hope...