Monday, March 24, 2014

Birthing the Miraculous

On January 6th, I watched a documentary, Compelled by Love, about Heidi Baker, an extreme lover of God and missionary in Mozambique.  I believe me watching this documentary was not by accident.  Before I go on, watch the trailer for the film.

This film inspired me to be a yielded, radical lover of Jesus.  I watched Compelled by Love on my iPhone in Ian's room while he was playing.  After awhile he said, "momma what are you watching?" I told him it was about this woman who loved God so much that she is a missionary in Africa! A missionary is someone who tells others about God's love for them and that Jesus died for them.  Ian, I want to do that, too!" I told Ian about how God uses Heidi and people in Mozambique to heal others. I told him that we, too, can do that! I told him how we just need to ask God to come live inside us and live for him.

Ian said,

"I want God to send Jesus to earth to heal people."

"I want to help Jesus heal people."

Then he said quietly, "God, come live inside me."

Then he whispered very softly, "God give me a dream." Looked at me and said, "I just tell him that!"

Let me tell you, God is about to do something in my family.  I really believe it and I wanted to write this blog post that I can look back and remember this.  I really feel this year is going to be different.  I believe that God is going to do some things that will propel my family into its calling.

Three weeks ago, I realized Heidi Baker has written books. I got so excited I knew I was suppose to order one! I prayed about it and felt the spirit leading me to buy her most recent book, Birthing the Miraculous.  I read it in two weeks and I have not read a book that quickly since before Ian was born. but I stayed up many nights reading Birthing the Miraculous and I believe this book was written for me to read.

Let me share some parts of the book:

"What does it mean to be overshadowed in the secret place? What does it mean to be overtaken and fully possessed by the Holy Spirit? What does it mean to dive deeper into the river flowing from God's heart? It means our life is not our own. It means we no longer exist for our own desire but His. Nothing is impossible in a life that is utterly yielded to Him...He is inviting us to dive deeper into the river of His presence so we can experience true life."

"I believe the Lord is calling us to a lifestyle of laid-down love that goes beyond waist-deep in the river.  It is a permanent lifestyle of 'lower still'. It is a call to dive into a love that is limitless, ceaseless, and bottomless- a call to relinquish control."

"It is when you become immersed in the love of the Father that you truly begin to love like Jesus."

"And God wants to take control us beyond what we can control.  He wants to take us to a place where we can be moved in any direction purely by the flow of His presence."

"I want to be fully immersed in the Holy Spirit.  I want to be completely covered until no one will see me, but only Christ in me."

"I feel that the Lord is inviting us into a place we have been afraid to live in- the supernatural realm of His kingdom, where His manifest presence surrounds and holds us like water in the ocean's depths.

"His river flows through us as a consequence of the intimate love found in the secret place.  We have to enter this river for ourselves in order to get the life that is found there.  Once we are immersed in His river, life will also follow us wherever we go- even into the darkest of places."

"Fruitfulness if birthed from love.  Bearing fruit is a delight, but it is not the final goal.  Intimacy with God must be our purpose. If we pursue Him above all else, fruit simple happens."

"Abundant fruit is the result of surrender, and any life that is laid down for the sake of love is a ministry life."

"We must remain in him at all costs.  The means yielding to Him when he speaks and obeying him.  It also means learning to rest in him."

"The Lord looks across the earth for sons and daughters willing to be fully possessed.  The lord looks for a resting place.  Will it be you?"

"The transition has come and it is time for God's promises to be born in our lives.  It is time to bear the most precious of fruits...God is ready and eager to perform miracles of supernatural swiftness on behalf of His children. On this very day He is even more eager than we are to see all of us coming together into the fullness of our destinies.  He loves for us to grow up into the fullness of His Son-Jesus Christ." 

Saturday, March 1, 2014

To Be Methodist or Not To Be Methodist?

The past month has been a whirlwind of the Lord opening doors and bringing opportunities into my life.

My most recent prayers have been that God would use me to impact people! Another lingering prayer of mine for the past 4 or so years has been for God to use my ability of singing and playing the piano for Him.

About a month and a half ago, I felt the Holy Spirit say to visit Christ United Methodist Church.  I thought, "God, did you know that I'm not methodist? Remember you called me to be at Believer's Church? Why would I change churches?! Why would I go to a methodist church?"

I did not listen and I did not visit Christ United Methodist.  I went on my way and I stayed in my comfort place of my church, with people I know, and the worship that I love.

Two weeks after that, I went to Christ United to fill out paperwork to be a fill in worker for church events.  My co worker works in the nursery at Christ United so this was my connection.  During this time of filling out paper work and touring the children's ministry, I met with the director so she would know my face for when I would sub.  

Before the tour, the Children's director for the church said, "I don't know why I'm telling you this, but we need a Children's leader for the 5th and 6th grade program.  You are exactly what we are looking for and it would be a miracle for this person to be sitting in my office within the next couple months."

During this conversation is when I remembered the lord had beaconed me to visit this church I was now sitting in.

Before I knew it, my heart had been completely melted as I walked into the 5th and 6th grade room. As I looked at the pictures of the 5/6th graders I held back tears and I felt the Holy Spirit melting my heart for these kiddos!!

I thought, "LORD NO!! I love my church! I'm not a methodist...I'm a CHARISMATIC believer!" I quickly learned I need to stop judging other denominations.  Just love people.  God calls us to love people.

I just cannot say no to God.  And I have learned to say I am sorry to God.  It's funny, after years of praying on my face prayers of God "use me", I said no and questioned Gods judgement of calling me to a methodist church. Is Jesus concerned about whether I am labeled Methodist or non denominational?

This church is such an awesome place and I feel so blessed that God has called me to be apart of it!

I have learned that I cannot say no to God!!

On my way to church on this Wednesday, I was talking with the Lord and asking him to use the gift of playing the piano and singing.  And on the way home from church another co worker called me and asked if I would lead worship for their brand new church.

I cannot say no to God.  

Tomorrow I will start leading worship for Living Word of Grace.  I'll do it for as long as God says to and I'm thankful for this opportunity.


With this said, when I started my second job at Christ Church I also had a massive wave of spiritual warfare.  This hit me through depression and anxiety.  After about three days this began to lift. Praise God!